It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
