Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
