STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
