Say something about gay babies.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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