ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
