Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize