Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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