Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Quick, to the slutcave!
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
