Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize