oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
