Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Too much gin, very little bucket
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Randomize
