my sisters under your porch take her home
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
