I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize