How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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