drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
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Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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