So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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