i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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