how do flat chested girls get laid?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
