so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
