Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
