I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize