If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
