her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
