you would pick up someone in the library
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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