You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
