You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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