I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
