Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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