toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
