See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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