umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
