when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize