Christians are straight up FREAKS
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
