YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize