my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
