Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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