I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
You were trust falling into bushes
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.