STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
You took a bar mat shot.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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