Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Randomize
