try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize