Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
They are going to name an STD after you.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
