They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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