There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Randomize
