Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
We need a shit load of segways right now
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Randomize
