We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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