turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
