My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
These tits shall not be calmed
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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