Will you blow on my dice?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
