I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
