Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
