if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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